In February of 2011 my Dad was diagnosed with terminal pancreatic cancer. They gave him three months to live. Since Cole was due to be born in April we knew I had to go as soon as possible. The first week of March I flew out to Arkansas with Lucy to see my Dad. It was a very bittersweet reunion. I hadn't seen him since the year before Lucy was born and we hadn't always had the closest relationship. He was a hard man to love but I still loved him. Hearing of his diagnosis was shocking and saddening but in part it was almost relieving. He had had some major health issues for many years and was struggling in many aspects of his life. I was sad (for lack of a better word, i'm using sad, though it doesn't begin to reflect my feelings) that he was going to pass away, but I was happy that he would get to leave this life and be free of the pain and sadness he was experiencing. And hopefully find the truth he sought after his whole life.
It was hard to see him in his condition. But it was nice to be with him for a few days and for him to get to meet Lucy. When Cole was born we called Dad up and told him Cole Michael Moss had been named after him. He was pretty happy to hear that. In early May Dad passed away. Because of a lack of funds, we had to make the choice of going to see Dad while he was still alive or going out to his funeral. I chose the former.
Since I missed the funeral, we made sure to stop by the cemetery where he was buried while visiting Arkansas for thanksgiving. It was good closure for me to spend some time at his gravesite. Up until then it never quite seemed final or real. I was glad to get to visit and see where he is buried.
We have several pictures of Lucy sitting at the grave of her namesake,
and we wanted some with Cole also.
Dad doesn't have a headstone yet, but it was marked with some pretty flowers and a white rock.
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